A Scene That We've Seen Before//Day 8

Today is going to be a rant-y sort of day. I didn't get much sleep because I just could not fall asleep, plus I was feeling sickish and girlish (and I still am now as well). I am broke, and naturally, when you have no money is when you want to do the most things and when you get invitations from all over to do things. But I can't do any of them. So I have to just sit at home. My sister, cousin and her friend are getting ready for Homecoming tonight which is another bone of contention for me. It takes me back to my Homecomings and how much fun we all had, plus it's always nice to get all dolled up to dance with friends. Which is something I can't do now. But, I'm also quite upset that my parents actually agreed to let my sister stay at the rents that will go on later, something I would never be allowed to do. I wouldn't have even be allowed to go TO the rents for a little while- it was basically go to the dance and come right back home. In fact, it was quite the surprise when I got a 3 AM curfew Prom night, but that was probably only because my cousin was driving us around. If not, I'd probably have to be home directly after Prom ended. Lame.

I guess my parents learned with me what worked and what didn't, and my sister pushes the issue a lot more, but I know that even if I had pushed the issue, it wouldn't have gotten anywhere. Sometimes I wonder if that has affected my friend situation today. Granted, true friends shouldn't (and haven't) cared about stuff like that if they really care about you, but I'm sure it would've been better had we been able to hang out more and do more stuff together. Though at this stage of my life, I just don't really care about it, and if I have the money, I go out. A lot of that comes from my freedom of living in Texas and being able to do whatever I wanted and not really having to ask anyone for permission. So now it is more of a letting them know where I will be, but never really having any idea when I will get home.

As for those complaints, I'm just annoyed that there is a lot of noise in the house which does not allow me to nap, read or concentrate. Maybe I'm just getting old and crotchety...

**Post title from Amber Pacific's "Falling Away"


DAY 8
Goals for the month:

1. Find a job.
2. SAVE MONEY
3. Manage to pay back the money I owe and my application fees
4. Start mailing out applications
5. Lose weight (I won't even give a number, but anything would be nice)